The 11 Rules of Chocolate
We don't know the origin of these hilarious rules of
chocolate but we agree with every single one!
- If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.
- Chocolate-covered raisins, cherries, orange slices, and strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.
- The problem: How to get two pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.
- Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less.
- Chocolate also contains milk which is dairy. So candy bars are a health food.
- If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.
- If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don't they actually counteract each other?
- Chocolate is derived from cacao beans. Bean is a vegetable. Sugar is derived from either sugar cane or sugar beets. Both are plants, which places them in the vegetable category too. Therefore chocolate is a vegetable.
- Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way at least you'll get one thing done.
- A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?
- If you can't eat all of your chocolate it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?
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